Once upon a time lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts.

Nick the Dragon Slayer obsessed over the Queen for this reason.
He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try to
touch them, but he had to try.

One day Nick revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio the
Physician, the King's chief doctor. Horatio thought about this and said
that he could arrange for Nick to more than satisfy his desire, but it
would cost him 1000 gold coins to arrange it.

Without pause, Nick readily agreed to the scheme.

The next day, Horatio made a batch of itching powder and poured a little
bit into the Queen's bra while she bathed.
Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense. Upon
being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident, Horatio
informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if applied for
four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests had shown that,
among all of the citizens of the kingdom, only the saliva of Nick would
work as the antidote to cure the itch.

The King, eager to help his Queen, quickly summoned Nick to their
chambers. Horatio then slipped Nick the antidote for the itching
powder, which he put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, Nick
worked passionately on the Queen's large and magnificent breasts.
The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Nick left satisfied and
was hailed by the King and Queen as a hero.

Upon returning to his chamber, Nick found Horatio demanding his payment
of 1000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, Nick couldn't
have cared less knowing that Horatio could never report this matter to
the King and with a laugh told him to get lost.

The next day, Horatio slipped a massive dose of the same itching powder
into the King's underwear. The King immediately summoned Nick . . .
The moral of the story - Pay your fuckin' bills!