Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: plymouth, MI, usa
every year english teachers from across the country submit their collections of actual analogies and metaphors found in
high school essays. here are last years entries.
1. her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had it's two sides gently compressed by a thigh-master.
2. his thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without cling-free.
3. he spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind
because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pin hole in it and now goes around the country
speaking at high scholls about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
4. she grew on him like she was a colony of e. coli, and he was room temperature canadian bacon.
5. she had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before he throws up.
6. her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
7. he was as tall as a six foot three inch tree.
8. the revelation that his marriage of thirty years had disintegrated because of his wifes infidelity came as a rude shock,
like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free atm machine.
9. the little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
10. from the attic came an unearthly howl. the whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation
in another city and jeopardy comes on at 7:00 pm instead of 7:30.
11. her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
12. the hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
13. long separated by cruel fate, the star-crosed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight
trains, one having left cleveland at 6:36 pm traveling at 55 mph, the other from topeka at 4:19 pm at a speed of 35 mph.
14. they lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled nancy kerrigan's teeth.
15. john and mary had never met. they were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
16. he fell for her like hs heart was a mob informant and she was the east river.
17. shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.
18. the plan was simple, like my brother-in-law phil. but unlike phil, this plan just might work.
19. the young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
20. he was as lame as a duck. not the metaphorical lame duck either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from
stepping on a land mine or something.
21. the ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
22. it was an american tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.
23. he was deeply in love. when she spoke he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
24. it's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.