Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Melbourne, Victoria, Australia
Subject: FRANK FELDMAN
A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by.
He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just
Cabbie: "Frank Feldman. He's a guy who did everything right - all the time.
Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to
Frank Feldman every single time."
Passenger: "There are always a few clouds over everybody."
Cabbie: "Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the
Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera
baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play
the piano. He was an amazing guy."
Passenger: "Sounds like he was something really special."
Cabbie: "There's more... He had a memory like a computer. Could remember
everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which
fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse,
and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything
Passenger. "Wow, some guy then."
Cabbie: "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic
jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never
made a mistake."
Passenger. "Mmm, there's not many like him around."
Cabbie: "And, he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good.
He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his
clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished to go - he was the
perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank
Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"
Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank."
Passenger: "Then how do you know so much about him?"
Cabbie: "I married his f***ing widow